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Dating With Debt: How Do I Talk To My Partner About Money?

Make sure the person is self-aware and really wants to get out of it sincerely. That, is totally worth it, the hustle to pay up on time, save and eventually get out of debt, even stronger and very much in love. It just takes a bit of planning, discipline, and hard work.

I got like $20K in student loans, plus another $10K on my credit cards. My girlfriend is thrifty and has MAYBE $500 a month she carries on her credit cards. If she knew how bad off I am, I’m not sure what she’d say.

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It’s suddenly a real thing, and you can more clearly see the tangible impact another person can have on your life. While having no debt is certainly the best situation, certain types of debt are worse than others. “Bad debt” is often the result of reckless spending, like a massive credit card balance or a giant car loan. In fact, the couple wasn’t just struggling to get ahead.

Joe later apparently told the poster’s brother-in-law off «about making him look bad so that he didn’t even have a chance.» Six in 10 people said they are no more or less interested in finding a committed relationship now than they were before the COVID-19 pandemic. Experts told Newsweek this blind date set-up was «inconsiderate» and «a poor judgment call» and that the poster has «no reason to apologize.» A woman who was upset to discover that she was on «a surprise blind date» at a recent dinner has been backed by users on Reddit, the online forum. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the lands where we live, learn and work.

Consulting with a professional when it comes to your financial situation will help you to build financial security. If he talks a big talk but never follows through on his word, it might be due to financial issues. Having big financial dreams and goals is great, as long as he communicates what’s a future goal and what’s a current promise. Without this clarity, his words might be mistaken for lying.

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However, I dated this guy for a few months who made quite a bit of money (just shy of $200,000 a year) and had almost six figures in credit card debt that was growing every month and he didn’t know why. But he did ridiculous things like take cabs everywhere just in case he wanted to have a drink even though he had a car, a bus pass, and a car-share membership. He would buy a meal, try some bites, then buy a whole new meal. All these odd little things that were adding up to huge debt and he couldn’t see it and would just complain about losing money constantly. Before we get to the signs you’re dating a man who isn’t financially stable, let’s go over a few caveats.

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His deception may be rooted in issues he’s trying to conceal, including money problems. Some men prefer not to begin serious relationships if their “bag” isn’t in order. This preference may be particularly true for men in their 30s and older who may be dealing with divorce debts and other mid-life financial issues. Hey, Warren Buffet, one of the wealthiest humans on the planet, isn’t big on spending lots of money on food and doesn’t drive flashy cars. «Things like me taking out a credit card because my partner has a bad credit rating, and despite the fact we both spent on it, I am having to pay it off,» she says.

By comparison, Generation X have a credit score of 650 on average debt of $125,000, while both baby boomers and the Greatest Generation have credit scores of 709 on average debt of $87,438. Credit scores, experts say, are built on experience, and millennials have plenty of time to improve their digits. Imagine meeting the man or woman of your dreams, falling in love and then finding out that they have over six figures in student loan debt—well above theaverage. The second you combine bank accounts with him, you’ll discover just how deep his debt goes, and his low credit score can impact the ability to buy a home and start a fiscally sound new life together.

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For you, if your student loans are indeed public, you qualify for government programs that can greatly cut your monthly payments. You might even be eligible for student loan forgiveness. The specialist will see if you meet the qualifications. has written often about the psychology of money, citing studies that prove money is why your marriage will fail. Yet just a few weeks ago, we ran this detailed infographic showing couples aren’t talking about money in marriage. Because your spouse is already feeling bad, it’s best to reassure him and help him find a solution.

If they are not entirely debt-free at the moment, then they are actively pursuing a plan to get there. More importantly, they should have enough saved up for small emergencies like a car breakdown or a trip to the emergency room. But different lenders may have different criteria when it comes to loaning money, and may approve borrowers with a credit score of below 700. A high score effectively means that their prospective date has been paying their bills off on time, or only uses a small percentage of their available credit on credit cards. Have you caught him lying about how he’s spending money, his financial position, his credit card debt, or other important financial decisions?

Evaluating your partner’s present financial habits will give you an idea about what you can expect to continue in future. If you think you can handle your partner’s financial obligations to his/her ex, there is no reason why you should back away from a relationship that is supportive and loving in all other aspects. And if you are still in two minds, consult a financial consultant and have a discussion on how you can plan for your future as a married couple with the resources available to you.